Let's bust yet another popular psychology myth.
"Money doesn't buy happiness."
"Before others can love you, you have to love yourself."
Popular psychology is full of myths and misperceptions. Money does buy happiness (if you know how to spend it). We like people who are like us (though, often, people who are complementary attract.) And saying, "Before others can love you, you have to love yourself," is ridiculous, and makes zero sense.
Last night was a rough night for basketball. Not only did Gordon Hayward suffer a horrific leg injury... but three (three!) of the guys I like playing with were unavailable for pickup, because it was "date night."
What are the odds, right?
But it got me thinking, "How come I've never done date night before?"
I love my friends. That's why I'm mean to them.
"Hey, man. There's this really cool Exeter party on Friday. I'd totally invite you... but, honestly, you're kind of a clinger, and I don't want to have to babysit you."
Being driven by a desire to win means that when you achieve your goal, you’ll feel joy. Being driven by a fear of failure means when you succeed, you’ll feel relief.
Whether training for your high school swim team or trying to make it to the pros, you've probably experienced a plateau. All athletes do! There are tons of physical reasons -- and one very mental reason -- why this happens.
"It is a happy talent to know how to play," Ralph Waldo Emerson once said.
He was exactly right. According to my master's research, playfulness isn't a trait -- it's a skill. But due to the ubiquity of technology (read: passive entertainment) and high-achieving childhoods, many young adults have yet to develop their leisure skills.
The fact that they're making less money and are more likely to have debt than ever doesn't help.
"It is a happy talent to know how to play," Ralph Waldo Emerson once said. And, unlike many well-known adages that were later proven wrong ("money can't buy happiness"; "don't compare yourself to others"; "don't praise your daughter's looks"), Emerson was exactly right.
Playfulness is a skill -- not a trait. Yet, because of changes in parenting styles and culture, many children no longer learn how to play.
In fact, thanks to helicopter parenting, children are no longer learning a lot of things.
Let's take a break from talking about playfulness and leisure skill development for a second to discuss something serious.
Is it sexist for women to think it’s the man’s job to make dates lively, entertaining, and memorable?
You know what I love about interacting with people who disagree with me? The inspiration that comes from hearing their viewpoints -- and the corresponding reevaluation and refining of my own views.
For example, I was recently asked whether it's sexist for women to expect to be entertained by men -- and it seemed like the asker was hoping for a definite yes. But the real answer... is maybe.
How to Work Out When You're Lazy - Advice From Someone Who Has NO Desire to Work Out, But Does All The Time
Whether for your health, your fitness, or your looks, many of us want to want to work out... but we don't.
I have the opposite problem (err, "problem"): I have no interest or motivation to work out... yet I do it all the time.
We all want our kids to have happy, magical childhoods (I hope).
And, due to changes in our society -- technology addiction, over-scheduled childhoods, and decreased participation in community activities, to name a few -- many adults feel like they don't have many friends in their neighborhood. In fact, one in four of us say we have "no close friends to talk to."
There's a simple way to address both of these issues.
About the Author
Eva is a content specialist with a passion for play, travel... and a little bit of girl power. Read more >
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