Why Today's Children (And Young Adults) Are More Sensitive and Fragile Than Past Generations.6/7/2017
Kids these days -- amirite?
No, but actually. For real. Kids these days are more sensitive and fragile than kids of the past. Even according to the president of an elite university that I spoke with recently, “Today’s college students are not like you.”
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I am a proud member of the Exeter alumni community -- see also: What it's Like to Go to Phillips Exeter Academy, the "Best High School in the Country". Exeter made me a thinker. It made me a listener. It made me unafraid to share my opinions. The Harkness Method of teaching, in which every class is a debate, a dialectic, or a discussion, was a foundational part of who I am now.
And now, due to an ill-informed Change.org petition, the future of that is at risk.
So you've been asked to give a speech, talk, or assembly. And you want it to be memorable. You want your audience to think -- to feel something. To question their entire worldview, perhaps.
Now you just need a topic. Skip the boring cliches. No one wants to hear you talk about abortion, the death penalty, gun rights, or minimum wage. These are huge and broad topics, and you're not an expert. You'll put your audience straight to sleep.
This week, I bared my soul in the semifinals of Mars Studios' songwriting contest... and I lost. But I had a wonderful time competing, and I got some helpful feedback from the judges.
And, due to the lyrics of one of my songs, I was reminded of the most hilarious review anyone's ever written on Amazon.
In the last week, I've heard three different people claim that comparing yourself to others is somehow bad -- one even did it in a comment on my recent post, 3 Scientifically Proven Ways to STOP Caring What Others Think About You and Live a Happier Life.
But here's the thing. Comparing yourself to others, done correctly, is probably the best way to learn, improve, and build up your own confidence. Here's why:
“You’re a very positive person.”
“He has a lot of negative traits.” “You have to weigh the positive and the negative aspects.” In English, we use the words “positive” and “negative” all the time. Colloquially, these words often mean “good” and “bad.” But in psychology, that’s not what they mean. Let me start by saying: I lied. Kind of. Psychology research shows that Unless You're a Psychopath, You Are OBSESSED With What Others Think of You. Because the ability to cooperate and form large societies is one of the biggest evolutionary advantages ever, we are hardwired to care tremendously when people think bad things about us.
BUT! We can absolutely decrease how sensitive to and aware of others' opinions we feel. Here are three scientifically proven ways to liberate yourself, and just be you.
I discovered Christina Hoff Sommers, the "Factual Feminist," totally by accident when I started reading her amazing book, One Nation Under Therapy: How the Helping Culture is Eroding Self-Reliance.
In it, she debunked many myths about the benefits of the "self-esteem movement," PTSD, and psychotherapy. After finishing the last page and saying, "Wow," I wondered, What else is Dr. Sommers working on? That's how I found out that she's a feminist and gender scholar at the American Enterprise Institute (AEI), and she has a weekly podcast, The Factual Feminist, which I sometimes agree with, and sometimes disagree with. (She doesn't always do a good job of backing up her arguments with evidence.) Everyone who's been paying attention knows that if anything mattered in 2016, it was La Croix. LaCroix is a lightly flavored, sugar-free carbonated water wrapped in a garish can. It was a favorite drink of Midwestern moms in the 1990s -- but suddenly exploded in popularity and ubiquity in the last year. The New York Times published an essay raving about it. The Awl and Time Out New York ranked its flavors. Young urban professionals everywhere can't stop talking about it. In short, it's become an obsession.
Maybe next, they'll just ban all alcohol and all parties.
Shame on you, Stanford.
First, you totally buy into Brock Turner's whole "men don't rape people -- alcohol rapes people" thing by banning hard alcohol. A move which, by the way, is not going to reduce sexual assault. Then, you publish the most victim-blaming, condescending website ever. In Female Bodies and Alcohol, which you've since had the sense to take down, you wrote, "Women who are seen drinking alcohol are perceived to be more sexually available than they may actually be.” And now, you've canceled one of Stanford's most outrageously fun and ridiculous traditions: Full Moon on the Quad. |
About the Author
Eva is a content specialist with a passion for play, travel... and a little bit of girl power. Read more >
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