While traveling in Malaysia this year, I met the most amazing woman. Vivacious, brilliant, and adventurous, this girl and I kayaked several miles of open sea in search of fish species we'd never seen before. We lay on the beach all night, watching the stars and eating watermelon infused with duty-free vodka. We trekked the python- and cobra-filled jungle in search of the elusive Penis Plant.
Last Night, I Screamed "NO!" In a Guy's Face Because He Wouldn't Stop Trying to Kiss Me. Would YOU Do That?
I screamed so loud, it echoed off the bricks and parking structures around us.
Fun fact: as a blogger, I get people pitching guest posts to me basically every day. I basically always say no. But once in a while, someone says something so brilliant, I've got to say yes. Among these: How to Be Happy, Even When You're Programmed Not To Be; 6 Reasons It's Not COMPLETELY Awful to Date A Guy Who Lives With His Parents; and If You Care About Women's Rights, Stop Saying Islam is a Religion of Peace.
Today, my friend Claire* told me a story I thought was worth sharing -- so we did a co-write of her experience with a "good friend" the other night.
Manners are great -- when appropriate.
But there is a time and a place for everything.
One of the most ridiculous (not rediculous) things you hear about dating is the absurd claim that "girls like jerks" and "nice guys finish last."
The reality is that, sure. Some girls like guys who are kinda jerks. But they don't like them because they're jerks. They like them in spite of it.
Most likely because they have so much else to offer.
Something major happens on the first day of October (and, sometimes, the first day of September) every year:
The menu at your favorite coffee shop changes. Just a little. But it is a very big deal.
We've all heard dudes lament that flirting/hitting on girls/commenting on women's bodies is "only creepy when the guy is unattractive."
Some women boldly declare the same.
Image source: NWS Seattle
Last night, after the most epic of all jam sessions (there was this moment when we were harmonizing Simon Garfunkel's "America," and we looked at each other and the sound of our voices meeting was, like, totally chilling), I said goodnight to my singing buddy and headed home.
But before I even got halfway, I messaged him: "Have you seen the moon tonight? If not, GO LOOK! Venus is really close to the moon right now."
Sometimes, something is said -- and without validation, it just becomes widely accepted as fact. For example, variations of, "Money can't buy happiness." Or, "Beyond [arbitrary number of dollars], money doesn't increase happiness." Or, for the truly wedged, "Kids who live on dirt floors and have nothing are just so happy." (If you really think that, you are wrong, and seriously need to check your privilege.)
I was never a fan of "motivational speakers" -- I have plenty of motivation, and when I listen to someone talk, it's because I want to laugh or learn.
But I stumbled upon an inspirational talk by author Brené Brown a few years ago, and it made me laugh and learn so much that I've listened to it at least once per year since.
Listen to it -- I guarantee you'll at least crack a smile.
True fact: "bitchy" is a gender neutral term.
And if you’re being passive aggressive, you’re being bitchy -- regardless of what’s in your pants.
And… it is my moral obligation -- to myself, to the speaker, and to society -- to ignore passive aggression.
About the Author
Eva is a content specialist with a passion for play, travel... and a little bit of girl power. Read more >
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