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"It is a happy talent to know how to play."

This "How to Prank a Gold Digger" Video is Hilarious. But It Misses a Crucial Point.

9/20/2017

10 Comments

 

​So I saw this funny video on my newsfeed last night. Though I enjoyed watching it, it also made me a little sad. Like... Watch it. What man actually thinks the first guy would ever get a woman's number?

It's sad that some guy would watch this and think, "Yeah! You go, bro!" without acknowledging a few important points. Like. 

1. The first dude looks creepy and weird. The second dude is well-dressed and presentable.

The first guy is literally dressed like a clown. He's wearing plaid pajama pants, a weird Hawaiian shirt, and a wool hat. 

In, like, LA or something. You can tell by how other people in the video are dressed that it's a warm day. Who wears a wool hat on a hot day? 

Jesse Pinkman:
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​And this guy.
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As a woman, when I see this guy coming at me, I think two things: mental health issue, or drug dealer. 

Of course he's not getting my number! 

2. The first dude's opening line is, "Hey, you're pretty cute! Can I get your number?" That... is a non-opener.

Look, man. Just because you think I'm cute, doesn't mean you're getting my number. Like... do we actually have anything in common? What would we do or talk about? You don't know a thing about me. 

YOU DIDN'T EVEN ASK FOR MY NAME!!!!!

Say I did give you my number. Would you just put me down in your address book as, "Blond girl in black dress from coffee shop?"

No. You're not getting my fucking number. 

See also: Interesting Ways to Start a Conversation That Aren't "Hi" or "Hey"

3. No means no, motherfucker.

I didn't say you can't have my number because I wanted you to keep pestering me until I relented. I said no because I don't want to give some weird stranger my number.

If I can't trust you to take no for an answer in this public, low-level situation, can I really trust you to respect that no means no in a private or intimate setting?

Plus, you're a drug dealer. So, no.

For more, check out: Why Most People Suck at Saying No, And How You Can Start Improving TODAY.

And remember, ladies -- if you don't learn how to say no, you might end up in a bunker:
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From: The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Gif ALL Women Need to See ASAP.

4. The second guy's opening line was, "Hey, how's it going? Is anyone sitting here? Mind if I join you?"

So not only does this guy not look like Asian Jesse Pinkman... but he's also much more polite. And rather than dehumanizing me by saying, "I don't care about your name. You're pretty enough that I'd fuck you, so gimme your number".......

He'd actually like to chat with me before asking me out.

​Imagine that! Treating a woman like an actual human being! 
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5. The second guy didn't ask for some stranger's number -- he chatted with her, then asked her out on an actual date.

He suggested a date. He picked a time (later tonight) and an activity (cocktails). 

Of course, I've previously written that I Judge Guys Who Ask Me Out For Drinks (though, if I liked him enough, I would have countered with, "How about we play basketball instead?"). But, honestly... does this look like the kind of girl who wants to go skateboarding or ball out on her first date?

I'll bet she loves drinks!

6. After the first guy takes off all his weird clown clothes, he's actually kind of cute.

They say you can't judge a book by its cover. But let's be real. When you know absolutely nothing about someone except that they just asked you for your number, all you have to judge that person by is their looks. 

It's possible -- though unlikely -- that the reason this girl changed her mind is because it turns out he's not creepy and ugly. 

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Yeah, she's probably more interested in the car than the driver's haircut. 

But given points 1-5, can anyone really blame her for rejecting this guy the first time around? 

And this, my friends, is why "lived experience" and "autoethnography" are sort of bullshit.

***

Want to know more? Check out:
  • 6 Reasons It's Not COMPLETELY Awful to Date a Man Who Lives With His Parents
  • 5 Things EVERY "Socially Awkward" Person Should Know
  • If You Waited 3 Days to Call/Text, You Won't Be Getting a Response From Me
  • The Stanford Kink Club Has the Healthiest Sex on Campus. Here's Why.
  • Dear Confused Dude: If You Think Women Are The Problem, YOU Are The Problem.
10 Comments
Lina
9/21/2017 10:55:03 am

I really wish that it weren't necessary to point this out.

Reply
Jadzia
9/21/2017 12:00:21 pm

Is this definitely a real prank? I can't help suspecting that the woman is actually a stooge.

Reply
Eva Glasrud link
9/25/2017 12:12:14 pm

It might be a fake -- the whole setup and outcome is a little too perfect. Nevertheless, I'm sure there are guys out there who are like, OMG HOW DARE SHE?

And I know for sure there are guys who are like, "Oh, if I go ask some random hot girl for her number before even getting her name, she might say yes! And if she doesn't, she's a bitch!"

Reply
Zeph
9/26/2017 07:25:48 pm

My reaction as well. It's crafted as a heavy handed setup for a put-down of the woman. Bias as many factors as possible to get her to say no,and then yes, then act as if it's only about money (as you analyzed in more detail).

They could have skipped the car and money part, and just "proved" that she was shallowly analyzing people by their looks - while giving her nothing else to discern with!

And of course if she had said "No, I'm not interested" and cut the first guy off when he didn't persisted, she would have been characterized as a rude bitch, rather than a lying one; I see the boyfriend excuse as her way of avoiding more awkwardness by giving him a face saving out, rather than trying to deceive him in any serious way.

I didn't find it that funny, more like pathetic regarding the intention of the makers. Seemed more like some guys trying to make themselves feel better by ridiculing somebody unjustly - "the women who don't go out with me are just money grubbing bitches, it has nothing to do with who I am or how I present myself".

And I too suspect she was part of the game too - she played her lines just a bit too well scripted for their point.

Reply
Jadzia
9/27/2017 07:59:59 am

When Guy 1 comes back and Guy 2 says he's his boss, their behaviour is over the top and I would expect the woman to be more suspicious. Plus she tries to ask out Guy 1 in front of Guy 2, who she has just agreed to go out with, despite having told him she has a boyfriend. Why doesn't she expect him to say something?

I hope it is a set-up because if not, it's unlikely they got such a perfect reaction with one try. They would probably have tried it on a number of women. Many would decline both guys. Others would accept a date with Guy 2, then find out that actually he wasn't interested at all and it was all part of a prank. Would they explain that they hoped the woman would suddenly be interested in Guy 1 once they heard he was rich? Would they suggest the women deserved it just for turning down Guy 1 and accepting Guy 2?

Reply
Zeph
10/1/2017 02:16:28 pm

Agreed. Someone would have to be pretty naive not to catch on that she was being pranked or set up. So this rich, good looking guy wanders around town dressed and heavily acting like someone unappealing (with fancy clothes underneath), then has an underling help him transform in public? Why would he do that? And after both have asked for dates, in their different ways? So her reaction is to try to get a date with the "rich" guy, without any reference to the odd behavior?

What's interesting to me is not what it's saying (n it' heavy handed way) about the woman actor, but what it's saying more subtly about the creators of the video.

Jadzia
10/12/2017 01:51:55 am

I am told that in the 1980s, my brother-in-law and some friends went to a yuppy bar in London and for a laugh gave each other posh sounding names like Tarquin and talked loudly about 100K deals and so forth. Apparently a lot of women were keen to talk to them.

While, I expect the story has grown in the telling, I once saw an article in a women's magazine on how to find a rich husband and it said that you have to go to the kind of places that rich men go.

Reply
Priyamvada Tendulkar
11/14/2017 11:46:03 am

What would this video be if the girl were not "hot" or conventionally good-looking? Would she be called a gold-digger? What if the girl equivalent of the males went to a "hot" guy (first a sloppy dressed, looks crazed kind of girl) and asks for a number and then a neatly-dressed, well-presentable one? Wouldn't the results be the same as the one in the video above? And what if then the first girl has a makeover and comes out looking conventionally "hot" and the (stooge) guy starts drooling over her ... what is he then? what would the video be? how to prank any (shallow) man ever? I really liked your analysis that peeled away the layers of the video. Totally unfair to expect women to just play along with any random guy without any prior info. There's a serious risk in that. Which girl is ever going to do that?!

Reply
Lhynzie link
3/20/2022 11:31:04 pm


It was all scripted.

Reply
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Reply



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